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 albero and the Stars at Night time~
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1
I Amore this wallpaper :3
wallpaper
random
nightime
beautiful
posted by fanfly
6
A while back I wrote an articolo about link. I've decided to follow it up with a tutorial on how to make icons! They're actually much the same- the major difference is size.

You will need an image editing program. I use Corel Paint negozio Pro but I think most people use Photoshop.

There's also the following online programs but I've never used them and this tutorial isn't necessarily meant to be used with them because I have no idea what these programs are capable of doing.

link
link
link




the Size of Your icona Matters


Now this part is extremely important and I can't tell te how many icone I've seen that...
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posted by iluvsmj
3
A mother was working in the kitchen, listening to her five-year-old son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop & her son saying, "All of te bastards who want off, get the hell off now, 'cause this is the last stop! And all of te bastards who are getting on, get your culo in the train, cause we're going down the tracks."

The horrified mother went in & told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want te to go to your room & stay there for TWO HOURS. When te come out,you may play with your train, but I want you...
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Ok so me and my friend Amore the mall but what makes it più fun are the following

-When your Lost looking for a store ask them in a british accents! here's an example "Pardon me, could te please point me in the direction of ______" (if u are british do it in a differnt accent like american austraian ect.)

-When te go into a store adress your friend da a differnt name and have a weird personality

-if te go into one of those store that plays the Musica REALLY loud, sing along like there's nobody else in the store but te and ur friend.

-Have weird conversations about random things. like terrorists o something

Have fun with Friends at the mall!
posted by ilovepenguins
5
50 Fun things to do in a Grocery Store

1. Ask the produce manager if he happens to have any fresh Oompah Loompah fruit.

2. While holding a cantaloupe directly in front of your chest, squeeze it and smile dreamily.

3. Every time te turn the corner with your shopping cart, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!”

4. Go up to the manager and tell him o her that you’ve Lost your mommy.

5. While waiting in line at the checkout, juggle some lemons.

6. Tiptoe stealthily up and down the aisles – and around corners – with a magnifying glass.

7. While scratching frantically, ask the manager if he o she has anything...
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posted by milorox18
18
1. When te get pulled over, say “What’s wrong, ossifer, there’s no blood in my alcohol?”

2. When he asks why te were speeding, tell him te wanted to race.

3. When he talks to you, pretend te are deaf.

4. If he asks if te knew how fast te were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to……

5. Ask if te can see his gun.

6. When he says te aren’t allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.

7. Touch him.

8. When he asks why te were speeding, tell him te had to buy a hat.

9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.

10. Refer to him da his first name.

11. Pretend te are gay...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
3
Welcome to The Weakest Link.

Here is a very simple little test comprised of four domande to determine the level of your intellect. Your risposte must be spontaneous and immediate, with no deliberating o wasting time.

And NO CHEATING. On your mark, set....GO!!!

1: te are competing in a race, and overtake the runner in secondo place.
In which position are te now?

Answer:

If te answered that you're now coming first then you're completely wrong. te overtook the secondo runner and took their place, therefore you're coming second.

For the successivo domanda try not to be so dumb.

2 : If te overtake the last...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
8
a boy was asked da his teacher to pick some spelling words for his homework. the boy goes home and asks his mum "what's a good spelling word?" and the mother risposte " Shutup, i'm busy", so he writes it down.
he goes to his dad and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and the dad risposte "da na na na Batman!" so he writes it down.
next he goes to his older sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she risposte "yeah yeah" so the boy writes it down.
he goes to his younger sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she risposte "lollipop, lollipop" so he writes it down.
Finally he goes...
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posted by Mallory101
4
" Watch out for the idiot behind me!"
Moooooove, I'm trying to speed!
If you're rich, I’m single!
0-60 in 15 minutes!
A clean car is a sign if sick mind.
100% Irony Free
Adrenalin is my drug of choice.
Adults are just kids with money.
Baby on bored
HOME SCHOOL. Smarter than ever.
I talk to strangers
I Think Feminists Are Cute!
Keep honking, I am reloading!
Pain is inevitable misery is optional.
To All te Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
Tennis players have fuzzy balls.
Your honor student deals the best drugs.


The fastest way to a fisherman's cuore is through his fly
Stupidity is not a crime so you’re...
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Wax the ceiling.
Loosen the lug nuts on your dad's new car.
Drop your cat from a high place, to see if it really does land on all four feet.
Repeat above until failure.
Rearrange political campaign signs.
Sharpen your teeth.
Play Houdini with one of your siblings.
Braid your Cani hair.
Clean and polish your belly button.
Water your dog...see if he grows.
Wash a tree.
Knight yourself and some close friends.
Found the Jim Jones' School of Modern Bartending.
Flirt with an evergreen.
Scare Steven King.
Give your cat a mohawk.
Purr.
Mow your carpet.
Rake your carpet (to clean up the clippings.)...
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added by fanfly
Source: wallpaperswide.com
posted by slytherin360
33
found this on the net:

9 Fun Things to Do During a Boring Lecture

1) When the professor asks a question, raise your hand. If the professor calls on you, point to someone in the successivo row and say "He knows." Pick a different person each time.

2) Buy a watermelon. Give it to the professor. If he/she asks, say "They were out of apples."

3) Bring a fishing rod. Try to catch things on the professor's desk.

4) Bring a tape player and a tape of a thunderstorm. Keep it hidden. Sometime during the lecture, start the tape, stand up, claim that the professor has angered the gods and leave. Watch to see...
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posted by thatguywashot
11
1.Pull aside an unruly child in a preschool Sunday School class and say: "If you're bad in here, you'll go to Hell."

2.A week beforehand, find a member of ACT-UP. Tell him the scheduled sermon is entitled "Why God Sent AIDS to Punish Homosexuals".

3.Put stray Cani in cappotto closets.

4.Un-tune the piano.

5.Replace the pianist's sheet Musica with "Stairway to Heaven".

6.Going through all the hymnals, mark song 666.

7.Find an empty seat, and ask the person successivo to it: "Is this sede, sedile SAVED?"

8.Toss around a giant spiaggia ball before service, like at Grateful Dead concerts.

9.Ten minuti before it starts, find...
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da a Harry Potter fan.

1) Ask them if being a Potterhead means they smoke pot.
2) Point out how much più successful Robert Patz was in Twilight.
3) Steal their Hogwarts robes.
4) Pretend to know what a Hufflepuff is.
5) Ask them why there is no yellow brick road in Hogwarts.
6) Get confused between Voldemort and Dumbledore.
8) Never use the number 7.
9) Call Bellatrix 'Big Head'
10) Ask loudly why Fred and George never noticed their brother was sleeping with a strange man.
11) Laugh at Dobby's death.
12) Refer to Hedwig as 'the strange birdie'
13) Buy them an Umbridge inspired dress for Christmas.
14)...
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GET READY TO GET ANNOYED...ALL METHODS FOOL PROOFED da YOURS TRULY!! :)
ANNOYING THINGS 2 DO UR FRNDS!
1. Keep poking them until they scream in annoyance
2. Pull an Annoying arancia, arancio on them. Keep saying, "Hey,(insert name) (insert name)," as long as te want. Really effective!
3. Keep shouting swear words randomly. Like shout out, "Shit!" when they're eating pizza o something. :)
4. Sneeze, HARD, whenever they're around. Continue again and again and again and again and again!
5. Keep repeating, "What? What? What?" whenever they ask a question.
6. Keep calling them ELEGANT names, like if you're friend...
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posted by NatalieSunshine
4
1.Run with her on the beach.
2.Give her your sweater when she’s cold.
3.Never talk about other girls infront of her.
4.Learn to play the chitarra for her.
5.Comfort her when she’s scared.
6.Watch the sunset with her.
7.If she can’t sleep read her a bedtime story.
8.If te get in a fight with her and she starts crying,just stop and hold her.
9.Never force her to do anything.
10.Call her beautifull,especially when she least expects it.
11.Never let her walk alone.
12.Play with her hair when she’s laying on your chest.
13.Always make the first move.
14.Never lie to her she’ll find out.
15.Kiss her when...
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added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus
added by SummerThunder
Source: Martz90
Hello I'm NOT the nostalgia critic, I remembered it so te don't have to. I've been watching NC's biggest dumba** in distress video and I thought I'd do one. Except for me it's only going to be characters that are animated and it's not only going to be female characters, there are some male characters here too. With other characters I can find at least some aspect of heroics in them except for these characters. Please keep in mind that this is just my opinion and I don't hate all of these characters. Please comments, enjoy.

10.Esmeralda(The Hunchback of Notre Dame)

I promise I'm not being...
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posted by iluvsmj
11
When you're happy and te know it bomb Iraq
If te cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are frisky,
Pakistan is looking shifty,
North Korea is too risky,
Bomb Iraq.

If te never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If te think Saddam's gone mad,
With the weapons that he had,
(And he tried to kill your dad),
Bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think someone's dismissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb...
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