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 The lupo clan was kinda awesome, except for the crappy animazione and the fact that they're allergic to shirts.
The wolf clan was kinda awesome, except for the crappy animation and the fact that they're allergic to shirts.
Okay, I'll admit that I haven't laughed this hard at a film since I saw The Hangover last summer. Seriously, what was the plot here? I actually found the first film to be much better than this travesty. te can find my review of the first movie link. I'll go through it like I do with all movies. Pros and cons, then an overall.

Pros

The Volturi

Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, te know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and te hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what Vampiri#From Dracula to Buffy... and all creatures of the night in between. do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole schiaffo, smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all te Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless Vampiri#From Dracula to Buffy... and all creatures of the night in between. on Buffy.

The lupo Clan

Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animazione of the Lupi (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the lupo clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.

Jacob

Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So te can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. te Team Jacob fans, I now consider te semi-sane because te recognized a HEALTHY relationship. Props to te guys.


Cons

Bella...you there?

I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely da her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her Friends at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even più with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole anno older than your 107 anno old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to Amore te anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fan out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.

How is she special too btw?

If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected da any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!

Edward...dude wtf?!

Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in Amore with te throws te into a glass tavolo for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons te in the forest. A car ride home would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass tavolo for her protection? That was totally safe. te know, because she was bleeding even più profusely after the tavolo than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started mostrare up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to te like that te can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I Amore you". Nice.

OMG a Plot Point!!!

Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, o whenever anyone detto Bella was recitazione crazy. If anyone spoke reason o a plot point appeared, it did not mostra again.

Lupin's lupo Looked Better...

The film must have had the world's worst computer animazione department because those Lupi were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animazione coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even più laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.

That's What She Said!

There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want te to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If te don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.

Blocked

Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face punch, punzone high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.


Overall

Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. te Team Jacobers, te got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless te want a really good laugh then da all means do. Oh and one più thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
 No plot and many opportunities for "That's what she said!" abound in this film. Also, Edward during this baciare is very reminiscent of a certain SNL skit.
No plot and many opportunities for "That's what she said!" abound in this film. Also, Edward during this kiss is very reminiscent of a certain SNL skit.
 Poor Jacob kept getting blocked and denied. In the end, Bella chooses the unhealthy relationship with Edward based on looks rather than the healthy one with Jacob based on the initial strong friendship.
Poor Jacob kept getting blocked and denied. In the end, Bella chooses the unhealthy relationship with Edward based on looks rather than the healthy one with Jacob based on the initial strong friendship.
I'm only writting 1 o 2 today. I'm in Orlando and is going sightseeing soon!

Alice's POV

Trouble can never avoid us. Can it? Sometimes, I wish that I didn't have the gift of seeing the future. It annoys me sometimes. But, I am grateful because if I didn't have this vision, we could all be killed in about 2 weeks. This is a HUGE problem! Maybe the Volturi can even solve this mess.. unless they are causing this!

I must be somewhere in South America. Stupid me! forgot to bring a map! I'm looking thorough the woods seeing if I could find anything that is similar to my vision. I sighed. I can't find...
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posted by Bella_Swan3
-Renesmee-

Renee almost touched me, then seemed to think better of it.

"Sit down," Renee whispered again, gesturing towards the porch swing. I sat, she sat.

"But Bella... died... " Renee whispered.

Lovely. So THAT was what this woman believed.

"She died. I saw her. Dead. Almost eighteen years ago. She was a victim of hit and run," Renee said, sounding panicked, as if she were only trying to convince herself.

I decided to play along, it was convenient. For my family.

"I was born a few months before that. She didn't want te to know," I lied easily.

"And the rest of the Cullens?" Renee whispered,...
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Hi! This is my first time writting for the Twilight Saga so please commento and te can also add suggestions. I'm only 13 years old so PLEASE be merciful if this is horrible.

Bella's POV

It has been two years since my marriage with Edward, the birth of Renesmee, and my transformation as being a vampire. Things were normal and the Amore between Edward and me hasn't change. Renesmee looks about 10 years old and is still growing fast. Things were getting too dreamlike, things were too perfect....

I feel like my brain is going to explode! I have nothing to do these days except to study for finals at...
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posted by Bella_Swan3
-Renesmee-

"Jacksonville?" I asked Jake.
"Bella wants te to meet Renee," Jake said.
"Who's that?" I had no idea who this Renee person was.
"Bella's mother. Your grandmother. Up till now, she had no idea te even existed."

I was speechless.

"Why am I meeting her then?" I managed to say. "She'll get mad at Bella for leaving her out of the life of her grandchild."

"Bella didn't want to leave her out of your life any longer." Jake said, pulling into the driveway of a small white house with faded yellow trimming and pale green shutters.

* * *

I was nervously biting my lip, my hands were clasped in...
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posted by Bella_Swan3
-Alice-

Edward and I were playing chess, hilariously fun, when I saw an image that did not involve chess pieces. I stiffened; then relaxed. So they liked Isle Renesmee. Good. It WAS my idea, after all.

And suddenly, I saw something that did not make me smile. I sighed and flicked my king over. It wasn't worth it.

* * *

Edward was the only one who would play chess with me anymore, mainly because it was fair.

I was a little depressed that there wasn't any wedding to be planned, and I didn't have any new project planned. Then, it hit me. RENESMEE'S CLOSET! Well, I'd already stocked her new house's (Esme had dato them their own house, she'd designed it and everything) mega-sized walk in closet and helped furnish the house, but I could always remodel her closet to look like a boutique!

I smiled in anticipation. I had to go call Esme!
After Bella married the vampire Edward, she became pregnant with their daughter. Sam, after finding out about this, decided to lead an unprovoked attack to kill Bella and the baby. Jacob and Seth, however, refused to follow Sam on this, and broke away from the pack to aid the Cullens. Leah, despite her dislike of vampires, decides to unisciti them so that she can protect her brother and get away from Sam. Her choice actually hurts Sam, who sends a messenger to try to persuade her to come back to his pack. She wants to remain in Jacob's pack until she can stop being a werewolf, and despite the initial...
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posted by _madz_
okay, here is the successivo one. its short, im sorry ive got exams but i couldn't leave te with nothing.
enjoy!



I reached out to gently brush her pouting bottom lip.
“Bella, te seem to be under a misapprehension.” I couldn’t believe she didn’t understand. I suppose she wouldn’t if she thought I didn’t want her. I closed my eyes, shaking my head back and forth, a slight smile on my lips. How to make her see?
“I thought I’d explained it clearly before. Bella,” just speaking her name brought me so much pleasure. “I can’t live in a world where te don’t exist.”
The frown on...
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 this is her most of the time on the floor crying
this is her most of the time on the floor crying
Book Two
~ ~
Renesmee

CONTENTS
~~


Preface
1.    Lifeless Days
2.    Who Am I Fooling
3.    A Good Distraction
4.    I Hate This Part
5.    Flirting with fire
6.    A Hope For Peace
7.    No Where To Run
8.    A Long Open Road
9.    Walking On Another Thin Line
10.    Look At This Photograph
11.    In Another Life
12.    Washington’s successivo superiore, in alto Model
13.    Fly...
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posted by Bella_Swan3
-Renesmee-

Once we hit the highway, I am just about to shake Jacob until he tells me where we're going. Not that I'd be able to sposta him. But where's the harm in trying to find out?

"Where are we going?" I ask him, for the third time.
"You know it's pointless, right?"
"Just checking," I smile. "I was hoping you'd just give in peacefully."
"Not a chance."

Eventually, after eight hours, we reach the airport.

Jacpb makes sure I don't hear o see where we're going, and once we both board the plane, I am so tired, I just rest my head on his shoulder, and the successivo thing I know, someone is shaking my shoulder....
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posted by just_bella
ciao all!! Just thought I would let everyone know that I started my own fanpop site to post my stories on. This will be the last one I put up here...unless the other site doesn't get enough people. If te go to the cerca and put in just bella you'll find it. Everyone is welcome to come!! Thank te to everybody for all the support!!!

End of Part 31

"We must leave and sooner rather then later." Edward detto as he started shifting his weight between his legs.

"I'm so sorry Ben, I would Amore to give te più risposte but they are right. We need to be going. Please don't tell anyone te saw us, that...
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Chapter 40: Captivity Loves Company (Nessie's POV)

Jane kept shooting Amore and I the dirtiest looks. She was jealous because we were Aro’s new pets, I was confident that he wouldn’t hurt us. We were too valuable to him. I worried for Nahuel though; they kept him locked up since he had already betrayed them once da trying to warn us. Amore was terrified and cried tearlessly most of the time. I touched her hand, “Stay strong, my sister. We will be alright.” She looked at me worriedly and held my hand tighter, “I want to go home.” I made sure not to have these silent conversations...
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Chapter 39: If I jumped of a cliff, would te do it too? (Jacob’s POV)

I had been confident up until we got upstairs. I looked at Seth and Leah and for a fleeting moment I was terrified that I might actually kill them. Instead of focusing on the fear and uncertainty I focused my thoughts on Renesmee. She needed me, the sooner I changed Seth and Leah the sooner we would be able to save her and Amore, and the sooner that I would have her in my arms again. Carlisle eyed me nervously, I felt horrible for what I was putting him through. I looked to Bella for guidance and she nodded, “I believe...
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posted by just_bella
ciao all!! I couldn't get on line yesterday...something about someone cutting a Ethernet cable o something. SO I'm going to try to get up a few stories tonight. :)

End of Chapter 23

"I'll do everything that can be done, but prepare Carlisle; the odds aren't good." I whispered.

"Alice, so help me if anything happens to you..I will go to hell and back to bring te back." He snarled.

"I've thought about that already Jazz." I detto as I laughed.

"Promise me te will come home to me when this is done. Promise we will never be apart again." He detto sadly.

"Yes, I promise. Just one thing Jasper." I said...
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posted by lovethecullens
Chapter 35: Fork’s Most Wanted
When Jake and I walked into the room the first thing that I noticed was that Seth was holding a sobbing girl. I didn’t recognize her, until she held her head up. I gasped. It was the girl that Sienna always drew. She looked at me, “Nessie?” She asked. I had to look closely but I knew it was Sienna there was something about the shape of her eyes that had remained the same even though absolutely everything else about her appearance had been radically altered. I ran up to her and hugged her. “The girl in your drawings-” I stuttered, she smiled slightly...
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Chapter 34: The First Night of Forever (Amore’s POV)
It was so odd to be up all night long not even so much as be sleepy da morning. Aunt Bella and Uncle Edward returned after a few hours and informed me that they found Seth and spoke with him and he had headed home agreeing to come and see me in the morning. I drew all night long. At first I could only draw myself with the mystery guy and then it started to freak me out so I forced myself to focus on other things. I drew my mother as she sat and watched TV. I saved it for a present for my father for the successivo holiday. I had to say it was pretty...
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posted by dinosteph
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, can I say sorry some more. I have been crazy busy, traveling back and forth back home now that school is out. This is a really short chapter that I wrote while I was on the bus, hopefully I can accomplish some more.

And also, I am still trying to find the successivo chapter in my untitled story, it's kicking around here someplace.

Enjoy!!



From the Beginning:
link




I grabbed a piece of newspaper, wrapping it around another glass and placed it into the box beside me. I was supposed to head over to the main house but with the conversation I just had with Jake, I didn't feel like...
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posted by AliceHaleCullen
10 Ways to Annoy Jacob Black

10. Never use English around him – instead, bark.

9. Call him a spazio heater.

8. Tell him that Cani make good pets, not good partners.

7. Ask him if he has RSVPed to the wedding yet.

6. Inform him that real men sparkle.

5. Walk up to him and claim te have imprinted. Say te Amore him and demand his paw in marriage.

4. Tell him that even though he may run at a boiling 108.9 degrees, Bella doesn’t find him hot.

3. Inquire as to how Leah is… and if he dreams about Sam the way Leah dreams about Bella.

2. Ask him if he likes to do things… doggy style.

And the Number One way to annoy Jacob Black?

1. Make him a day-by-day flip calendar, counting down the amount of time Bella will remain human.
posted by just_bella
This story is getting so fun/addicting to write!! I might have to do another tonight..let's see how this one goes first :)

End of Chapter 21

"He made up his mind as soon as your 'friend' confirmed that it was too late to save you." I said.

"But he...he left! He didn't want me anymore! What difference does it make now? He knew I would die sometime!" She yelled.

"I don't think he ever planned to outlive te da long." I detto quietly.

"How dare he!" She screamed as she jumped to her feet.

As she rose, Jacob stood up too, putting himself between Bella and I as if he were going to protect her from...
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Chapter 32: The Truth is often Hard to Take

My new parents and I drove my new grandfather’s Mercedes to my memorial. It was so odd, although I had driven down the same streets in Forks all of my life this was the first time that I truly saw them. My human eyes hadn’t taken in all of the details and I was itching to draw them. I sighed. “What’s wrong, love?” Rosalie asked with her eyes on me in the rearview mirror “I just wish that I had my sketchbook,.” She looked at me sadly, knowing that it was too much of a risk to go to my house and get it. Emmett looked back at me, “On...
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posted by lovethecullens
Chapter 30: It All Comes Together

“Wait Alice,” Rosalie interjected. She turned to me her brow furrowed in concern, “we need to go talk for a moment.” She took my hand and led me down the hallway to her room. We sat down on the letto that she never used, and she looked at me carefully. “I support your decision fully, but I want to know why te are so determined to go to your memorial service.” I looked at her blankly I couldn’t find the words to explain it. I needed closure. I needed to see if my father and sister even cared enough to mostra up, although part of me knew that they wouldn’t....
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