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Does this sound like a good idea?/ titolo sugestions

There's this guy (let's call him Mike) who works at a pizzeria and left behind a life as a serial killer after he got out of prison 3 years and 5 months ago. One night while he was closing up he heard something fall in the party room. So he goes to check on it. 4 little kids were picking caramelle up from the floor and a teen (lets call her Lilly) was there too. Mike asked them what they were doing, and told them he would call the police.

The kids ran and screamed, Mike eventually found them and they wouldn't stop screaming, he killed them and stuffed their bodies in the animatronic suits. Lilly remembered the trial Mike had and began running, He knocked her out and took her far away from the state.


I got this idea from watching my cousin play fnaf and listening to Crossfade
 666demon posted più di un anno fa
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Kantanelly said:
While some people say there is no bad idea, only bad writers, te should be able to take this idea and develop it completely adding quite a bit of background including parts of the trial Lilly remembers. However, if Lily is a teenager, te need to develop a really good reason o basis for Lily to be interested in following and subsequently remembering certain parts of the trial considering most children could care less about any kind of trials such as this. Plus, considering Lily is still a minor and would be even younger 3 years and 5 months ago, te also need to develop a reason that her parents would allow her to not only know about a serial killers murder trial but to spend as much time as it would take to have lasting memories and great affect and effect for her to be able to connect the dots from three and a half years fa to today.

Also, it has only been 3 years and 5 months. If he was found guilty of murder, not manslaughter, te will need to have a very good reason for him to be released in such a short time. 3 years and 5 months equals 41 months. Is there any significance in any of the numbers? Is there an additional aspect to this world? Is it a modern earth o antique?

I find it very helpful to write down domande that te want to answer and explore in your writing. What domande do te want your readers to consider? What are te trying to provide a perspective on? I think this would be really interesting as a character development on Lily. Basically, Lily would be your perspective o narrator of the story. ( I just got a crazy thought - what would happen if we the reader are initially told that Lily is the narrator but the ending twist turns out lily is not telling the story? Something similar to that movie about the crazy neighbor Mom holding that girl in her basement and allowing the neighborhood kids and her own kids to torture her. In that story, the ending was forked. At first, we think she is able to escape only to return with her parents to find out she was really dead in the basement. It is not a light movie, so watch it at your own risk. te simply can't unsee o unwatch something no matter how badly te want to)

This has the possibility to become a horror. Make sure te know which genre te are aiming and keep your audience o readers in mind. Sex and violence cells, but ask yourself how far are te willing to take the inhumanity of abduction, murder, and evil. Good luck and keep us updated!
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posted più di un anno fa 
Firewriter said:
Doesn't sound that bad. Do te think te could be a little più descriptive about the background, the setting, time, area.
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posted più di un anno fa 
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