Why do some people put blame on others for their own behaviour and not do anything about it!! instead of complaining, shouldn't they be responsible for all the difficult things that happen to them?
It's cause some people are born and raised pampered, they were never told no, they were never told about taking responsibility. And when they get older, they feel that they are owed something and don't have to take responsibility for their own fuck ups, because for them, it's easier to blame other people than to just accept their own fault.
posted più di un anno fa
Hell, while I'm at it I'll even vouch for the people who have 'never been told no'. Like I detto to coke; I don't want to sound argumentative. Just want to provide some Cibo for thought. Is that really truly 100% their own fault? It's like the whole participation trophy thing; maybe this generation expects awards for nothing (I don't buy that either but I digress) but which generation handed out those trophies? Maybe a kid becomes a bratty adult because they were never told no. But is it all on them? They were literally raised like that. It's all that they know and so when real life hits them it hits hard. Because suddenly they aren't being pampered and coddled. They suddenly do have responsibilities but they don't know how to handle them because they were never taught. And instead of trying to teach this person to take responsibility many people are quick to judge and condemn and so they never learn.
It's easier to blame other people than to take responsibility, sure. But it's also easier to condemn and judge than offer a helping hand, advice, and/or guidence.
No, of course it's not their fault that they're the way they are. But as a person who works retail, when a person demands the manager because I tell them I can't cash in their lottery ticket because they tore the bar code off, it is in my god dato right to tell them to go fuck theirselves XD
Having a pampered 'everyone's a winner' up bringing can only get te so far with sympathy for me. I can understand why some people become serial killers, because they got beat as a child o weren't allowed out of their house. But I still think they should rot in prison
I feel like those two things are so different that they can't really be compared because one is più of a self-esteem issue and one outright harms other people. I do think that the everyone's a winner thing can have some very adverse side effects (such as getting frustrated easier when a person doesn't pick up on things right away). But that's why I think that instead of condemning it, it should be treated as a thing to be helped if that makes sense. Like teaching a person that it's okay to lose sometimes and that it's normal to NOT win everything. Of course if they're being bitchy about it, that's a little different lol.
What Windwaker said. I also like to add that some people blame their autism, etc., for their detto fuck-ups. Mainly the ones that are able-bodied and competent enough to live a normal life.
posted più di un anno fa
Don't mean to sound rude here but, to a degree autism can affect behaviors? Like, a lot? I don't know too much about autism but to some degree it impairs social functioning. One of my friend's friend has it; she's very smart and very capable. But her autism makes it genuinly harder for her to connect to others. It isn't that she doesn't try, it's just that it's not working well because her autism makes it difficult for her.
Mental illnesses are like physical ones. No one (with basic human decency) tells someone with a broken leg to stop being a baby about it and just walk. If a leg is broken it's broken. It needs time and help to heal. The same can be detto for autism, depression, bipolar, etc. It doesn't just go away even if te medicate it and seek therapy. It's a process. And like with a broken bone, some people need professional help to recover. Problem is that mental health is expensive and since it isn't overtly life threatening most people neglect it for physical needs.
I shouldn't say 'most. But still, an alarming amount of people. And mental illness is much harder to recover from than any physical illness. I don't think that people with mental illness should be condemned, mocked, o vilified for not always being able to 'just take responsibility and fix it'. I think that più sympathy and compassion should be extended.
^ It depends on the level of Autism. Some people who are autism do have a harder time functioning, but then te have those who don’t need as much help (if at all) with certain things. Take me, as an example. I’m autistic, but I’m not disabled. I don’t need anyone to hold my hand 24/7, and help me with every little thing. I’m perfectly find doing stuff on my own.
@Shadow That makes sense. I feel like it's one of those things where no one experience is going to be the same. Different people have different needs and different stressors that can set them off. @Coke Understandable and happens to the best of us!
"Shouldn't they be responsible for all the difficult things that happen to them." No. Some shit just sucks. Sometimes awful shit just happens and there's nothing that could have been to prevent it and nothing is gonna change it.
As for blaming others; that kind of depends. For example it's 100% fair to blame people like cagna McConnell for putting them out on the streets. Single handedly this man decided on $600 stimulus instead of $2000. Depending on where one lives $600 isn't enough to make rent. People who (due to covid--100% not their own fault/something they were responsible for) Lost their jobs are struggling. That $2000 could have been what kept someone fed and off of the streets.
So it really depends on the situation. Generally I think that the answer to "shouldn't they be responsible for their own hardships." is no.
And I kind of think that it's inconsiderate to be all, "do something instead of just complaining about it." There's nothing te can do if someone dies. There's nothing te can do if te find out that you're terminally ill. And it isn't as easy as 'just think positive' when you're hit with something THAT awful. I think that 'just think positive' is a little ignorant. And 'stop complaining and do something' is extremely insensitive. Especially if you're dealing with someone who has depression o any other type of mental illness. Some people literally don't have the mental and/or physical tools to 'just do something about it' even if they want to. And so often times they resort to venting and crying for help which comes off as complaining.
"But some people complain about everything!!!" When you're depressed af little things seem so much più profound.
And lastly, with something like depression. It really isn't easy to 'just do something about it'. One of the worst things about depression is that it saps away all of your motivation and drive to do ANYTHING even the little stuff. So taking on the big problems??? Depression also saps away hope and if te feel hopeless te wonder what the point of even trying to 'do something' because it feels like it won't amount to anything.
So yeah, not a fan of the 'stop complaining and do something' mentality. Iffy on the blaming thing because sometimes there are people who can outright cause a person's struggles (abusers, bullies, etc.).
posted più di un anno fa
Would write my own answer but this covered everything I was gonna say and did it better than I would've lol. I just wanna add: there are are a variety of reasons that people seemingly "lack" motivation - mental, financial, issues with family - many of which are interconnected and mutually reinforcing. And a great many of those factors really AREN'T their fault, and some of these are just completely outside of their control (like what zan detto about someone dying o being terminally ill). te can't just "take personal responsibility" and "think positively" and "pull yourself da the bootstraps" out of certain (common) situations. And mental / financial distress make it all the più difficult to do so.
"Anyone who tells me that I don't have a right to cagna about it can catch these hands" lmao I will protect u in court. Nah but in all seriousness, sorry it's been such a shitty anno for you, and I hope 2021 is kinder. te have a certified right to cagna about 2020, I will sign off on it.
"I think that if literal millions of people (in America alone) are facing homelessness because of a pandemic and shit tier handling then maybe it isn't the people at fault. Maybe it's a corrupt and broken set of systems that have failed the general public." gonna go emblazon this on a camicia
