(WARNING: Profanity OUT OF THE WAZOO! Viewer discretion advised. Also, pie.)

(I will drive te to madness da letting te figure out why the heck I detto pie. ;D)

Here's a trick question, what's one plus one? ^___^

JASON DERULO SUCKS.

Seriously, I don't mean to be mean, (BAD PUNS FTW!) But Jason Derulo.... He's not good. Almost every song he made is either bland, lame, forgettable, o perverted as hell.

Some MASTERPIECES he made include Talk Dirty, In My Head, and......

Wiggle Wiggle. :P

(WHAT THE MOTHER FUCKING FUCK!?)

And then there's..... This song, I wouldn't call it Jason's worst song, but it's still shit.

Like, "I will vomit all over your decayed excrement" Shit.

I also can't help but notice EVERY GODDAMN PERSON ON THIS PLANET LOVES IT! MY Friends Amore IT, MY COUSINS Amore IT, THAT FUCKING cuscino OVER THERE LOVES IT!

Let's just this over with, this is Jason Derulo's "Trumpets."

Also, CREATIVE NAME THERE. >.<

"Every time that te get undressed
I hear symphonies in my head"

...



WOW, GREAT WAY TO START A SONG! THINKING ABOUT A NAKED WOMAN, FANFUCKINGTASTIC.

"I wrote this song just looking at te ooh, oh
Yeah the drums they swing low"

And I wrote this review looking at your shitty song.

"And the trumpets they go
And the trumpets they go
Yeah the trumpets they go"

Great idea there! Repeat the SAME GODDAMN LINE THREE TIMES IN A ROW.

THIS ISN'T TETRIS DUDE, IT'S SONG WRITING!

"Da da, da ra ra da, da, da
Da, ra, ra, ra, da, da
Da da, da ra ra da, da, da
Da, ra, ra, ra, da, da
They go"



"Is it weird that I hear
Violins whenever you're gone"

Is it weird that your Canto reminds me of the devil's dong?

"Is it weird that your ass
Remind me of a Kanye West song?"

Is it weird that your lyrics remind me of shit from King-Kong?

"Is it weird that I hear
Trumpets when you're turning me on?"



Yes, this will be the episode of the Spongebob memes. :D

Seriously though, HOW DO PEOPLE LIKE THIS SHIT!?

I mean, I know it's fine to have an opinion, BUT HOW DOES NOBODY SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH THIS!?

AND IT GETS EVEN BETTER. ;D

"Is it weird that your bra
Remind me of a Katy Perry song?"

..............

.____.

Are te fucking kidding me.

ARE te SHITTING ME.

WHAT THE FUCK!??!!??!?!?!?

I mean, the chorus line sucked, but I could've just ignored it, and I did! BUT THIS IS WHERE I DRAW THE LINE.

FUCK THIS SONG, FUCK JASON DERULO, AND FUCK MY LIFE RIGHT IN THE P**SY!

Don't do drugs kids. :P

"Every time that te get undressed
I hear symphonies in my head
I wrote this song just looking at te ooh, oh
Yeah the drums they swing low
And the trumpets they go"

Repeating the same goddamn lyrics from before.....



"(And they playing for te girl)
And the trumpets they go
(Ha, yeah)
Yeah the trumpets they go
[Background:] Da da, da da da da [x7]
Yeah the trumpets they go
(Go, go-go, go-go, go, go-go)
And they go"

DADADAADDADADDADADADA MACHINE GUN DADADDAADADADADA X_____X

SERIOUSLY, IF te AREN'T EVEN GOING TO MAKE WORDS THAN te SHOULDN'T BE Scrivere SONGS!

Goddamn it Bobby.

"(Damn) Is it weird that I hear
angeli every time that te moan?"

IS IT WEIRD THAT YOUR FACE REMINDS ME OF A KIDNEY STONE?

"Is it weird that your eyes
Remind me of a Coldplay song?"

Songwriting 101: FUCKING RHYME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SERIOUSLY, WHO THE HELL TAUGHT te TO SING, A PILLOW!?



"Is it weird that I hear
Trumpets when you're turning me on?"

So the "Moan" rhyme was pointless.

Dumbass.

"Is it weird that your bra
Remind me of a Katy Perry song?"

Is it weird that YOUR SONG FUCKING SUCKS, YOUR Canto IS TERRIBLE, AND te SHOULD DIE IN A FIRE!?

"Every time that te get undressed
I hear symphonies in my head
I wrote this song looking at te ooh, oh
Oh, yeah"

Could te at least TRY to make new lyrics!? Good lord, this SONG FUCKING SUCKS!!!!!!

Kind of like YO FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



"Every time (Every time) that te get undressed
(Every time that te get undressed)
I hear symphonies in my head
(I hear symphonies in my head)"

Oh no, in my head....

*Flashback*

THAT FUCKING SONG IS FOR ANOTHER DAY.

"I wrote this song (I wrote this song) just looking at you
Ooh, oh (Just looking at te girl)
Yeah the drums they swing low"

What the hell does "The drums swing low" Mean?

Why am I even questioning this. This song is from a guy who made another song called "Talk Dirty."

FUCK IT ALL!

"And the trumpets they go (Acapella on 'em)
They go, oh-ooh, yeah
Come on, come on, come on
They go "

THANK Gesù CHRIST ALMIGHTY THE SONG'S OVER.



In conclusion, HOW DID THIS SONG GET SO POPULAR, IT SUCKS ASS!!!!

Also like Drive By, it's catchy, BUT THE LYRICS ARE ABSOLUTE SHIT. AND IF te DON'T LIKE THE LYRICS, te DON'T LIKE THE SONG.

Why? Maybe because THAT'S WHAT THE SONG'S ABOUT!

It fills me with uncontrollable rage that people ACTUALLY LIKE songs like this, and it's just madness.

Yes, te actually just saw somebody say that without referencing the meme.



Anyways, the successivo song I'll be revie-

Jason Derulo: te KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THAT BIG FAT BUTT? :DD

Me: Oh no.... o-O

Jason Derulo: WIG-

Me: LIGHTNING CHAOS REAPER CHOP! *Bonk*

Uh, see te guys later.... o-O

Oh boy.............