Peg-leg cucciolo

-when te ask someone for something and they try to annoy te because they have it and te don't

-school, you're there for 7 hours a day, they give te work te have to do at home and te have almost no freedom

-JB, 1D, big time rush

-when your Friends call saying they'll come over and never mostra up

-you like something your friend doesn't like so they HAVE to complain and say it sucks

-getting no freedom at your own home and being controlled da your parents

-crab cake

-girly things

-uptight people who can't stand jokes and practically spit in your face if te make one "dirty" o "wrong" joke

-overprotective...

Katniss:

Peeta and I had just won the Hunger Games. A televised fight to the death. My sister, Prim, had been picked to be in the Games, so I took her place. Now I was at home with her and my mother. Peeta was living in a house near me. We had pretended to be in Amore for the Games so we would both win. I don’t really Amore him, but I think that he really does Amore me. Well, now everything is normal. Prim, my mother, Peeta, and I are fine. Everything is different, though. I had been so used to living in the Seam, that all of these luxuries from winning the Games seem abnormal and unusual to...

ATTENTION PEOPLES OF HOGWARTS AND BEAUBATONS AND DURMSTRANG AND PIGFARTS AND ALL te MUGGLES INBETWEEN! I AM CHANGING THE STORY LINE PLOT THINGY FROM AL QUEDA ATTACKING AMERICA TO A WIZARDS BATTLE! PLEASE STILL ENJOY THE ORIGINAL AND TAKE CARE! I WILL POST THE NEW VERSION SOON!


This is a random book I was Scrivere about Al Queda attacking America, and I got the idea from my friend, who had a nightmare, and detto I could write a book o something. This is the first chapter, so I'd Amore it if te could post your thoughts about it, anything I could change, things te liked, things that didn't make...

NAME: Greg Bulmash

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President o Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a anno plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING:...

The vodka Hotline: 772-257-4492

Outsource-A-Breakup To India: 631-403-2029

Bible Stories in 60 Seconds: 240-258-4010

The "Free Marijuana" Hotline: 267-436-5129

The Divorce Hotline: 631-403-2016

IRS Tax Extension Help Line: 267-436-5139

The "Loud Talkin' Redneck" Hotline: 401-285-0705

A Life-Saving Message: 267-436-5115

"Twilight" Obsession Hotline: 973-409-3307

Ruminations: 631-403-2013

Tech-Support Hotline: 772-257-4678

Automated Sobriety Test: 781-452-3027

movie hotline 781-452-4066

Gay Marriage dibattito Line: 413-497-0148

Beer Goggles Hotline: 954-482-4332

Your Status aggiornamenti Are Annoying: 267-436-5224

"Travel...

I find homework to be arrogant and inefficient. Schools think they are so important that they can dictate whether o not the kid can have time after school for other, also important things. yeah, we learned all this in class and some kids didn't get it, but first of all, it is not like nobody else in the class understood it, secondo of all, they won’t get it any better without a teacher to help, and third of all, if they care enough to get anything out of their education anyway, they will ask somebody for help.
Of course, there are classes in which homework makes sense, such as my AP world...

1. Take someone's shopping carrello and switch the items with stuff from the person successivo to them's carrello
2. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen te in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment
3. Smash the person in front of te on the head with a ham
4. Go up to some old geezer & say "Grandpa!!! You're ALIVE!!! It's a MIRACLE!!! etc."
5. Take something from someone else's cart, when they say "hey, that's mine! " call the security and say that the other ... person was trying to take your _____
6. sposta "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas....

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When te are dating..... Farting is never an issue.
When te are married ....You make sure there's nothing flammable near your husband at all times.

When te are dating..... He takes te out to have a good time.
When te are married ....He brings home a 6 pack, and says "What are te going to drink?"

When te are dating..... He holds your hand in public.
When te are married ....He flicks your ear in public.

When te are dating..... A Single letto for 2 isn't THAT bad.
When te are married ....A King size letto feels like an army cot.

When te are dating..... te are turned on at the sight of him naked....