People (well, I say people but I mean tossers) often ask me why I like girls più than boys. Well today I think I just realized what the answer is. I bumped into Danny Seaborne, a guy who used to live near me when we were kids. He used to be really fit but now… well now he works in Greggs and looks like he's their main Cibo tester. Danny was my first boyfriend. Kind of. We went on four dates. When I was fourteen. Back then I thought he was kinda of cool. He always wore this Kappa bombardiere giacca and his baseball berretto, tappo at a jaunty angle (I was fucking young...)

We went to see Independence Day....