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Now hold on a minute, not all of these are mine, some I randomly heard them and some are mine. Anyway, I hope te guys like them. ;]

I postato this articolo on the random spot too so I detto why not post it here, after all this is the right place. Hope te like it. Thanks for reading. ;)

"Why, do te find me irresistible?"

"No, I just dress better than you"

"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

"I Amore the secondo grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl says you're gay, and te actually are, I find the best burn is: "At least I can get a boyfriend."

Look them in the face with a deadpan expression. Simply say, "Yes. I'm gay," and walk away. Take their thunder away. It's such a juvenile thing to say in the first place.
o just say, "Well, I guess you'd be the one to know."

I'd just say "Whoaaa. I know te have fantasies but keep them to yourself."

"why, te interested"? :) :)

That's not what your mom detto last night.

'And...? This concerns te because...?'

Gay is not an offensive thing to be called. SO I would take it più as a statement than an offense.

At least I'm not a homophobe.

Well honey, I guess te would know better than anyone would since te were biting the cuscino last night.”

What tipped te off, my great sense of style, biting wit o was it your GAYDAR honey?

"I'm not even going to acknowledge your stupidity and close mindedness.' and walk away. It's not worth getting into a pissing match over. Pick your battles.

"It takes one to know one" always worked well for me.

It belittles the homophobe within his own warped value-system, without belittling you. It's rather childish of course, and is not of course 100% literally true, but although I haven't actually used it in 30-odd years (not having been called gay for a while), I've often had cause to reflect on its essential wisdom. Many gay-bashers are hiding, I believe, something of a rosa streak within themselves.

Must admit the best reply I ever heard was to a real bit brute of a fella and he was totally shocked.

The big fella detto "Oi are te bent"

Quick reply was " Why have te got a crooked cock"

That was the end of that.

"Is that a statement o a come-on?"

YES I am HAPPY have te got a problem with that?

"I wear glasses as well. Just in case te didn't notice."

"Usually when one accuses another of being homosexual, it is simply to cover up their own fears and insecurities and thoughts about being homosexual themselves".

o0o0o0o baby te would know, then blow a baciare at them.

"And why exactly would te want to know...?"

Then turn and walk casually away.
Don't even play their silly little game da trying to make a "Comeback".

"Does the term get a life mean anything to you?"

o there's always the classic- give him a pitying look and walk away.

No, I'm ecstatic!!!, say it with a massive grin on your face.

"Yea, so blow me"

"ooof, te find me cute, don't te ;)"

Just say, If te don't tell anyone that I have a wooden penis then I wont tell anyone that te have splinters in your mouth.

Thanks. And I'm an adult too."

And walk away.

Why bother staying near idiots like this?

''And you're cute!''
Don't forget a 'menacing smile' yo...

Don't hate Me because te aren't me!

And you're what? Sad?

Well, if te AREN'T gay o bi, and the person who's asking is the same sex te are, try, "If you're looking for a date, you're going to have to look somewhere else; I can't help you."

o -- "I don't know what te need, but you're not going to find it here."

o -- "What's bugging you? Something to hide? te pulling a Larry Craig on us?"

Larry Craig is the conservative Republican "pro-family" U.S. Senator from Idaho who has been hateful to gay people to try to cover up that he, himself, has sex with strange men in public washrooms (despite having a female spouse back home.)

te want to avoid risposte that insult gay people. te want an answer that insults o at least deflects the person who is starting the anti-gay attack on you.

I deleted it, it was duplicate.

What kind of "cable" do te get. It looks like te have DSL.

Well, I prefer to be known as jolly o happy, but I appreciate te wanting to include me in your social group.

In my case, "No, only halfway." :)

Are te dropping hints .. and if te are .. sorry you're not my type .. that's what I'll say .. lol .. ciao not that I'm gay ..

te weren't complaining last night!

"I', sorry if I misled you. I prefer the opposite sex so I would not be a fun date, but we can still be friends."

te only say that because I turned down your boyfriend.

At least I know the difference between “you're” and “your”.

te may want to say so are many other people and that is not very nice! It is your choice what te want to be in your own ways! Many people are gay but that does not bother most people and it doesn't bother me!

And you're point is.....

I'm sorry I know te want me to be a homosexual so we can hook up but I'm really not gay so it just wouldn't work between us.

"Is there a problem with being happy?" (using gay as a derogative term, as I sense that this is..is nothing più than ignorance and tells a lot about the person saying it) Don't worry be gay!

"I thought we were going to keep this quiet until we're both ready to come out".

.. And te find me attractive?

'Say'no I'm not gay, but ciao but te don't need to take my word for it just ask your mom.

You're straight. Thanks for the observation.

'thank god, I didn't think te felt the same, come here lover!"

In fact I am gay. if you're intention is to insult me at least put some thought into it.

I may be happy (gay)but ,not desperate enough to want to go out with you....

Want my number?

Best comeback for guys when another guy says you're gay just look at him and point to you're Penis and when he looks just say who's gay now? and walk away.

If this is high-school- first, is there anything about that statement that hits closer to home than te would like? If there is, deal with this immediately, and then bite the bullet-
say yes.
whatever any foul idiot with no imagination calls you, say yes. After te agree with them, there is nothing più they can do. Turn it around, and throw it back in their face. I was tormented through high-school, middle-school, elementary school- te name it.  Ugly, a lesbian, a witch, whatever. Say yes. They stopped calling me everything after I agreed with them. When they called me a lesbian, I put the two fingered V up to my mouth and flicked my tongue, and the guys taunting me flipped out and ran away- no joke. These tormentors will not stop immediately, because they're testing you, but hold firm. When te do not react, they can not hurt you.

How about "if te have a problem with that, then te are the one with the problem"

Pucker up and say " Your place o mine?"

Like Jerry Seinfeld detto "not that there is anything wrong with that"

'So is your face!'

Please note that the fir st reply doesn't work if the person is your brother o sister...

Seriously, though. If someone calls te gay with a genuine intention to hurt te based on your sexuality, let them. Tell them they're right, o wrong as the case may be. A person that crude and insensitive doesn't deserve your attention.

"Your mother (if you're a girl) didn't seem to mind."
"Your father (if you're a boy) didn't seem to mind."

te say "yes I do find myself to be a very happy person." o say "that's not my name at all, te should really try to keep your names/faces in order."

Gay has many different meanings and is also a name.

How about "Hey, ducky, you're the one whose dating me."

"Not without cena and a movie first!"

Why? Are te looking for a date?

I'm sorry, but I just don't like te like that. Sorry things didn't turn out for you.

"I never noticed before but te have a great butt, honey" *blow kiss/wink and walk off*

"But I thought te liked it last night" *pout*

"No, but your girlfriend/mom/sister sure does Amore anal!"

Damn Skippy! Now dip me Cioccolato and throw me to the lesbians!

Haha!

Bend over and lets find out :P

te better believe it baby, now turn around and I'll mostra te how it's done.

"would te please excuse me, and walk away".

Well if the other person is of the same sex as you, te can always say something like " Just because I am hot does not mean I am yours!"

LOL...This has happened to me...Another female told everyone I was a lesbian. I confronted her...She of course played it up for her friends, and as she was walking away, I grabbed her and kissed her. Am I a lesbian? No. Did she ever say anything about me again? No. Muahahaha

OH darling, that coming from someone who gave me a good blow job last night.

Oh am I? Tell me about it.

I know te are but what am I? (I always find that so lame it just cracks me up)

"I'm not a lesbian, but my girlfriend is!"

If they don't like it tell the straighties to stop making gay babies.

Why! I didn't know te were gay? ..You're not?...Then why are te giving me a physical appraisal?

Jack: "Hello, are te Gay?"
Gay: "Yes Jack, Nice to meet you"

And you're about as straight as a circle.

So is your Dad, look how te turned out.

For a kid: "They say gays have the best gaydar!" (or equivalent "takes one to know one")
mostrare te don't care ("I support gay people" "What, are te GAY?" "Um, yeah, because the fact I've just stuck up for gays means I'd be reeeeeeeeally insulted if a bigot thought I was one.")
If you're an adult, though? Seriously, who gives two shits? It's not an insult, and when people mean it as an insult it's just a quick way for te to find out they're not worth your time.

Yeah.... In your wet dreams .

Isn't it weird how we can always recognize another gay?

With a deadpan expression, and a flat toneless voice -

"gosh that really is a killer insult...."

followed da a big yawn.

Would it significantly raise your IQ if I was?

At least when I look into a mirror, I don't break it!

Are te free Saturday night?

If it's a girl:
"Sorry to disappoint."

in general:
"You're right! I AM a happy person!"
"Did te find that in a trash can? It kinda stinks..."

"YOU'D wanna know."

"Sorry, bud. Not interested."

"is that your face, o did your neck throw up on you?"

"If te were looking in the mirror, I'd say the same."

Why'd te say that, are te fantasizing about me again?

"Only in your wildest dreams"

"AWW! recitazione a whittle tough just cause te can't have me?

"Get your pants off and we'll test that theory"

"Only for you, sexy!"

"your mom/dad sure found out"-OH da the way is he/she free this Saturday night?
"your mother/father tells me that all the time"

"I know that te are jealous but do try to understand sweetie that I am just not attracted to bitches/dickheads so go find another girl/guy to have a crush on" and if he/she says he/she doesn't have a crush on te say "that's funny te are giving me all this attention and not on the guys/girls why is that"

o "I am not the one that's oppressing about it do te have something te want to tell us" and if he/she says that he/she is not oppressing about being a gay then say "hey I am not the one who has detto the word gay "x" times there's nothing wrong with te being sexually attracted to women/men"

te know what? I would absolutely Amore to see life from your point of view, but I simply can't seem to stick my head THAT far up my ass.

Is that an offer?

I know that's your sexual fantasy.

Give them a condescending look and say "Well, yeah, that's why I don't have time for small-minded fuckwits like yourself."

Yeah, Gay like a Fox!!

How about "no shit?!" :) congratulations te aren't so stupid after all.

Okay, these are a lot, well I was bored. :]
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Famous Quote #1
People are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
Abraham Lincoln
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Famous Quote #2
Everyone has problems, some are just better at hiding them.
Unknown
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Famous Quote #3
If we did all the things that we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.
Thomas Edison
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Famous Quote #4
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.
Dennis P. Kimbro
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Famous Quote #5
Sometimes your joy is the...
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