I found these online, and thought they were kinda funny, :)
Credit: wiki answers, wattpad.com, b l o g s p o t.com
How many Twilighters does it take to screw on a light bulb?
I don't know, they're all too busy fighting over who gets to be Mrs Cullen
What happened when Emmett Cullen stubbed his toe?
He made the whole city collapse!
Rosalie Hale was told to find something just as o più beautiful then herself. She came back with a mirror!
How do te stop Jacob Black from attacking you?
You pick up a stick, throw it and yell "fetch"!
How do te irritate Edward Cullen?
Buy him a dog and call it Jacob!
Why can't Edward read Bella's mind?
There's nothing to read.
Jasper will never be a therapist because he already knows "how te feel about that".
I keep wanting to steal Jasper
but everytime I go to his bedroom window
Alice is waiting with a baseball bat...
how does she kno... oh yeah!!!
Dear Diary,
I would like to La Push Jacob of a cliff.
Amore Edward
I went to La Push Washington, and all I got was this stupid imprint.
Jasper Hales first job was as a paperboy, there were no survivors.
Tips for guys trying to find a girlfriend:
1. Read the Twilight Saga.
2. Watch Twilight movies.
3. In every real-life situation, think, "What would Edward do?
Boy: te know Edward Cullen isn't real, right?
Girl: Well fake boobs aren't real, but te still like to look at those!
Dear Edward,
Thanks a lot...
sincerely,
Guys everywhere
Credit: wiki answers, wattpad.com, b l o g s p o t.com
How many Twilighters does it take to screw on a light bulb?
I don't know, they're all too busy fighting over who gets to be Mrs Cullen
What happened when Emmett Cullen stubbed his toe?
He made the whole city collapse!
Rosalie Hale was told to find something just as o più beautiful then herself. She came back with a mirror!
How do te stop Jacob Black from attacking you?
You pick up a stick, throw it and yell "fetch"!
How do te irritate Edward Cullen?
Buy him a dog and call it Jacob!
Why can't Edward read Bella's mind?
There's nothing to read.
Jasper will never be a therapist because he already knows "how te feel about that".
I keep wanting to steal Jasper
but everytime I go to his bedroom window
Alice is waiting with a baseball bat...
how does she kno... oh yeah!!!
Dear Diary,
I would like to La Push Jacob of a cliff.
Amore Edward
I went to La Push Washington, and all I got was this stupid imprint.
Jasper Hales first job was as a paperboy, there were no survivors.
Tips for guys trying to find a girlfriend:
1. Read the Twilight Saga.
2. Watch Twilight movies.
3. In every real-life situation, think, "What would Edward do?
Boy: te know Edward Cullen isn't real, right?
Girl: Well fake boobs aren't real, but te still like to look at those!
Dear Edward,
Thanks a lot...
sincerely,
Guys everywhere
Okay, I think it's so unfair that Emmett gets no attention!
Jasper- gets attention because of his power people are always making fun of him
Edward- Hello of course he'll get attention i mean HE is like the MAIN character other then Bella.
Alice- All people feel bad for her. She doesn't no were shes from and she has all her hair cut off so yeah we feel bad for her.
Rosalie- She is PRETTY so almost all boys fan Amore HER
BELLA-I mean come on SHE IS THE MAIN character!!!
Jacob-WHO doesn't Amore Jacob?
and LASTLY we have Emmett
Emmett- te never find a Team Emmett thing anywhere. He is THE Amore OF Rosalie so most boy fan Hate him. and Most girl fan are all over Edward o Jacob.
don't get me wrong I Amore Edward and Jacob it's just that Emmett hardly has any fans!
so come on girls lets mostra our spirit for THE HOT AND MUSCULAR GUYS!!!!
GO EMMETT!!!
Jasper- gets attention because of his power people are always making fun of him
Edward- Hello of course he'll get attention i mean HE is like the MAIN character other then Bella.
Alice- All people feel bad for her. She doesn't no were shes from and she has all her hair cut off so yeah we feel bad for her.
Rosalie- She is PRETTY so almost all boys fan Amore HER
BELLA-I mean come on SHE IS THE MAIN character!!!
Jacob-WHO doesn't Amore Jacob?
and LASTLY we have Emmett
Emmett- te never find a Team Emmett thing anywhere. He is THE Amore OF Rosalie so most boy fan Hate him. and Most girl fan are all over Edward o Jacob.
don't get me wrong I Amore Edward and Jacob it's just that Emmett hardly has any fans!
so come on girls lets mostra our spirit for THE HOT AND MUSCULAR GUYS!!!!
GO EMMETT!!!
So in Alice&Jaspers wierd&love Alice finds out she has a daughter and Alex(her daughter)changes her diet and brings her home to the family,everyone likes her!!
So in the New Story Alex and Renesmee become best Friends and they start school together and go through everything together like with family,friends,crush's,the imprinting and maybe falling in love!
hope u like it!!!when it comes out!!
Read to find out what happens!!in this new story!!!
So in the New Story Alex and Renesmee become best Friends and they start school together and go through everything together like with family,friends,crush's,the imprinting and maybe falling in love!
hope u like it!!!when it comes out!!
Read to find out what happens!!in this new story!!!
Bella's Pov.
I ran and ran in the castle. The middle door. There was Jasper and the man
with...ROSALIE!!??
"So, te decided to marry me, my love?"
"Well...let's just say that I'm ready to defeat you! AND YOUR SO CALLED
'MASTER'" I detto loudly.
I grabbed Rosalie untied her and detto quickly to get the others free.
SHE REGAINED HER STRENGTH!!
"Now, it's time to deal with YOU!!"
I threw a potion at Jasper that Carisle gave me for my birthday. Jasper
yelled and screamed. I threw the potion at the "Master" too.
Then he fell to the fround, and the mantello disappeared. I saw his bare face.
Then, an image appeared. Then, I realized there was a mask! The real trouble
maker was...ESME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I ran and ran in the castle. The middle door. There was Jasper and the man
with...ROSALIE!!??
"So, te decided to marry me, my love?"
"Well...let's just say that I'm ready to defeat you! AND YOUR SO CALLED
'MASTER'" I detto loudly.
I grabbed Rosalie untied her and detto quickly to get the others free.
SHE REGAINED HER STRENGTH!!
"Now, it's time to deal with YOU!!"
I threw a potion at Jasper that Carisle gave me for my birthday. Jasper
yelled and screamed. I threw the potion at the "Master" too.
Then he fell to the fround, and the mantello disappeared. I saw his bare face.
Then, an image appeared. Then, I realized there was a mask! The real trouble
maker was...ESME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!