What women should tell men...but don't
1. The reason why our bras don't always match our underwear is because WE actually change our underwear.
2. The successivo time te and your buddies make jokes about armed women in combat, take a sondaggio to see which of te successfully aim at the toilet rim.
3. If we're watching football with te - it's not bonding - it's their butts.
4. Whenever possible, please try to say whatever te have to say after the movie.
5. Lay off the beans several hours before bedtime.
6. Please don't drive when you're not driving.
7. If te were really looking for an honest answer, te wouldn't ask in bed.
8. The successivo time te make jokes about female drivers, research the number of accidents caused da rubber-necking mini-skirts.
9. If only women gossip, how do te and your Friends keep track of 'who's easy'?
10. Stop telling us most male strippers are gay: we don't care.
11. When you're not around, I belch loudly, too.
12. We don't mind if te look in the mirror to check your appearance - in fact, please do!
13. When you're out with us, please wear 'our' preferito outfit rather than 'yours' - the torn jeans and dirty T-Shirt will last longer that way.
14. If te must grunt in reply, please develop a system to indicate a positive vs. A negative grunt.
15. Don't insist that we 'get off the stupid phone' and then not talk to us.
16. Eye contact is best established above our shoulder-level.
17. Cleaning the house is not necessarily 'women's work'; besides, most of the 'dirt' and clutter is yours anyway.
18. Yes, we know most of the great chefs are men, why is it then te never want to cook?
19. We go to the Ladies Room in groups to talk about you.
20. Yes, we know te can probably beat us arm wrestling' however, very few raises o promotions were gained da arm wrestling the boss.
If te don't read this, someone else wil
1. The reason why our bras don't always match our underwear is because WE actually change our underwear.
2. The successivo time te and your buddies make jokes about armed women in combat, take a sondaggio to see which of te successfully aim at the toilet rim.
3. If we're watching football with te - it's not bonding - it's their butts.
4. Whenever possible, please try to say whatever te have to say after the movie.
5. Lay off the beans several hours before bedtime.
6. Please don't drive when you're not driving.
7. If te were really looking for an honest answer, te wouldn't ask in bed.
8. The successivo time te make jokes about female drivers, research the number of accidents caused da rubber-necking mini-skirts.
9. If only women gossip, how do te and your Friends keep track of 'who's easy'?
10. Stop telling us most male strippers are gay: we don't care.
11. When you're not around, I belch loudly, too.
12. We don't mind if te look in the mirror to check your appearance - in fact, please do!
13. When you're out with us, please wear 'our' preferito outfit rather than 'yours' - the torn jeans and dirty T-Shirt will last longer that way.
14. If te must grunt in reply, please develop a system to indicate a positive vs. A negative grunt.
15. Don't insist that we 'get off the stupid phone' and then not talk to us.
16. Eye contact is best established above our shoulder-level.
17. Cleaning the house is not necessarily 'women's work'; besides, most of the 'dirt' and clutter is yours anyway.
18. Yes, we know most of the great chefs are men, why is it then te never want to cook?
19. We go to the Ladies Room in groups to talk about you.
20. Yes, we know te can probably beat us arm wrestling' however, very few raises o promotions were gained da arm wrestling the boss.
If te don't read this, someone else wil
my friend sent me this text message a while fa and i thought it was hilarious!!!
i need to ask te somethingand i want te to be totally honest with me. it may be awkward between us after this but i have to kow how te feel... I've kept it in for a while now but now it's time to be straight up and just confront you. i hope this doesn't ruin anything we have, i just need to know and i dont see any other way i could get over this. it just doesn't seem fair if i dont gett an answer. i want te to tell me truthfully, please no matter how harsh it is. i just want your hoest opinion...
Pepsi o Coke?
Ha ha ha ha !!!
Funny.
i need to ask te somethingand i want te to be totally honest with me. it may be awkward between us after this but i have to kow how te feel... I've kept it in for a while now but now it's time to be straight up and just confront you. i hope this doesn't ruin anything we have, i just need to know and i dont see any other way i could get over this. it just doesn't seem fair if i dont gett an answer. i want te to tell me truthfully, please no matter how harsh it is. i just want your hoest opinion...
Pepsi o Coke?
Ha ha ha ha !!!
Funny.
•Everyone in this place is unhappy. And since they're unhappy, they're probably looking for someone worse off than they are.
•You know who isn't human? te know who isn't human?! PEOPLE LIKE YOU!
•Up to this day, I've never killed a single human.
•You will never see me again.
•I was going to let te go; after all, there aren't many of us out there, but you're just such a pain in the ass.
•Please forget about everything.
•Are te enjoying this?
Kouta: "I thought we were friends."
Lucy: "We are friends, that's why you're still alive."
Kouta: "You killed my father, Kanae.. and my sister Kanae... For that I will never forgive you."
Lucy: "All this time, I've lived in hope of telling te how sorry I am, I've fought armies, just to have this chance, but now, there's nothing I can say that's good enough."
Kurama: "Regret is the domain of those who have earned the right to look back on the past. All I have is shame."
The End
•You know who isn't human? te know who isn't human?! PEOPLE LIKE YOU!
•Up to this day, I've never killed a single human.
•You will never see me again.
•I was going to let te go; after all, there aren't many of us out there, but you're just such a pain in the ass.
•Please forget about everything.
•Are te enjoying this?
Kouta: "I thought we were friends."
Lucy: "We are friends, that's why you're still alive."
Kouta: "You killed my father, Kanae.. and my sister Kanae... For that I will never forgive you."
Lucy: "All this time, I've lived in hope of telling te how sorry I am, I've fought armies, just to have this chance, but now, there's nothing I can say that's good enough."
Kurama: "Regret is the domain of those who have earned the right to look back on the past. All I have is shame."
The End
Million has 6 zeros
Billion has 9 zeros
Trillion has 12 zeros
Quadrillion has 15 zeros
Quintillion has 18 zeros
Sextillion has 21 zeros
Septillion has 24 zeros
Octillion has 27 zeros
Nonillion has 30 zeros
Decillion has 33 zeros
Undecillion has 36 zeros
Duodecillion has 39 zeros
Tredecillion has 42 zeros
Quattuordecillion has 45 zeros
Quindecillion has 48 zeros
Sexdecillion has 51 zeros
Septendecillion has 54 zeros
Octodecillion has 57 zeros
Novemdecillion has 60 zeros
Vigintillion has 63 zeros
Googol has 100 zeros.
Centillion has 303 zeros (except in Britain, where it has 600 zeros)
Googolplex has a googol of zeros
Gazillion has 86430 zeros
---------------------------
Billion has 9 zeros
Trillion has 12 zeros
Quadrillion has 15 zeros
Quintillion has 18 zeros
Sextillion has 21 zeros
Septillion has 24 zeros
Octillion has 27 zeros
Nonillion has 30 zeros
Decillion has 33 zeros
Undecillion has 36 zeros
Duodecillion has 39 zeros
Tredecillion has 42 zeros
Quattuordecillion has 45 zeros
Quindecillion has 48 zeros
Sexdecillion has 51 zeros
Septendecillion has 54 zeros
Octodecillion has 57 zeros
Novemdecillion has 60 zeros
Vigintillion has 63 zeros
Googol has 100 zeros.
Centillion has 303 zeros (except in Britain, where it has 600 zeros)
Googolplex has a googol of zeros
Gazillion has 86430 zeros
---------------------------
Chuck Norris can make onions cry.
Chuck Norris can cancella the Recycling Bin.
Ghosts are actually caused da Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
Chuck Norris can strangle te with a cordless phone.
Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
Chuck Norris once had a cuore attack; his cuore lost.
Chuck Norris doesn't turn the light on; he turns the dark off.
The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror, the mirror shatters; not even a mirror is stupid enough to get between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris's tears can cure aids, too bad he never cries. (silvaze9)