Twilight la saga Article: Things Bella Would Never Say ...

43

posted by chocolate-bear

I found this hilarious lista on bellaandedward.com. Enjoy :)

Things Bella Would Never Say
1) Edward, drive faster! (Sent in by: Michelle)
2) Edward, I hate te and I don't Amore te any more. (Sent in by: McKenna)
3) I hate Edward (Sent in by: Emma)
4) Charlie, could te cook dinner? (Sent in by: Jade)
5) Lets go live in Florida! (Sent in by: Brenna)
6) I'm in Amore with Sam Uley. (Sent in by: Brenna)
7) te know what, I think this is only a crush, Edward! (Sent in by: Brooke)
8) Give me a makeover Alice! (Sent in by: Riza)
9) Mike is the hottest guy on earth! (Sent in by: Lilyn)
10) Edward -- I'm sorry, but I don't Amore te anymore. I've realized that my true Amore is Mike Newton. (Sent in by: Andy)
11) ciao Edward, can te go bite Jacob? (Sent in by: Alex)
12) I've decided I don't want to become a vampire anymore. (Sent in by: Stephanie)
13) Good god Edward, te and I are both so perfectly tanned! (Sent in by: Mia)
14) Well, since I obviously smell so good to the vamps, maybe Jasper and I can hook up. successivo on my list: Carlisle and Emmett! (Sent in by: Courtney)
15) I think I'll just stay human. (Sent in by: Chris)
16) I don't want to be a vampire anymore. I enjoy being a human too much. (Sent in by: Megan)
17) Edward, I absoltuly hate the color of your eyes.
18) baciare me, Mike! (Sent in by: Brianna)
19) Oh my god Edward! You're a vampire?! (Sent in by: Maddy)
20) Sorry Edward, I just used te to get to know Emmett. (Sent in by: Lilyn)
21) OH MY GOD. A vampire? And a WEREWOLF?! *runs away screaming frantically* (Sent in by: Phoebe)
22) Let's race! (Sent in by: Gabby)
23) I'm sorry Edward but I am just too coordinated to hang with te (Sent in by: Alexis)
24) Edward, I would just Amore it if te had red eyes! (Sent in by: Laura)
25) No Edward! Don't bite me! (Sent in by: Laura)
26) Alice, I hate te and te can't be my maid of honour! (Sent in by: Laura)
27) I wish Tyler had taken me to the prom (Sent in by: Laura)
Edward. I'm sorry, I just can't be with te anymore. I'm going back to Jacob, he still has a heartbeat. (Sent in by: Whitney)
28) Edward, will te bite me? I want to know what my blood tastes Edward, I don't want to be a vampire. And I'm going to go ask Aro to kill me. Adios, amigo! (Sent in by: Sara)
29) I wish te wouldn't breathe on me Edward - your breath stinks! (Sent in by: Sarah)
30) I'm going to the spiaggia to get a tan! (Sent in by: Ella)
31) I rock at ALL sports! (Sent in by: Katie)
32) Mmm, delicious spaghetti, Dad! (Sent in by: Brenna)
33) Edward, let's go party! (Sent in by: Alysha)
34) I want a BIG wedding! (Sent in by: Mackenzie and Jennifer)
35) te know, why did te have to kill James? I really loved him te know! (Sent in by: Bubbles and Pussycat)
36) Can we pleeeeeeeeease go play sports? (Sent in by: India)
I'm sorry Edward, but I'm seriously considering going and marrying Jacob tommorow. Hope te don't mind. (Sent in by: Morgan)
37) Mike Newton is a stud muffin! (Sent in by: Jennifer)
38) te feeling alright Edward? Cause you're looking kinda pale... (Sent in by: Laura)
39) Alice, lets have a sleepover. We can paint our nails, and do our hair, and even spend money! (Sent in by: Samm44)
40) Edward, I just dated te to get the coupe. Sorry. (Sent in by: Sam)
41) Edward, te are the cheese to my macaroni. (Sent in by: Allie)
42) Alice, te throw the best parties!! I Amore them!! (Sent in by: Lauren)
43) Y'know, when I jumped off that cliff? I really was trying to commit suicide. (Sent in by: Doriz)
44) ciao Edward, how about te go with Esme and I hook up with Carlisle. (Sent in by: Samara)
45) Edward, I used te to get Jacob. (Sent in by: Alysha)
46) Let's go to the PROM, Edward!! (Sent in by: Charlotte)
47) Eddy, I'm thinking of dying my hair blonde and going the cheerleaders, whatca think? (Sent in by: Amy)
48) I was thinking we could honeymoon on the spiaggia in Hawaii! (Sent in by: Kelsey)
49) te know Edward, I think when I'm a vampire we should get a dog! (Sent in by: Shelby)
50) Edward, I think it's really creepy how te watch me when I sleep. Please stop. (Sent in by: Alice)

nessie-eska, hinata-elric- and 41 others like this

14 more comments

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funnyshawna heres one ooh, sleepover! fun!

tnme Here is one: Sorry Edward, I want Jacob's baby

wildcats13 13) Good god Edward, you and I are so perfectly tanned! 19) Oh my god Edward! You're a vampire?! 38) You feeling alright Edward? Cause you're looking kinda pale... Haha... these are my favs!!! Hilarious. LMAO

zeri95 i love 41 "Edward, you are the cheese to my macaroni" rotfl literally i crack up whenever i read it!!i also like:21,19 and 46 great job guys!!

BellaSwanCullen 3) I hate Edward (Sent in by: Emma) SHE SAID IT TO HER FATHER WHEN SHE WAS ESCAPING 4) Charlie, could you cook dinner? (Sent in by: Jade) SAID IT WHEN SHE WASNT FEELING GOOD, 2nd or 3rd BOOK

BellaSwanCullen 32) Mmm, delicious spaghetti, Dad! (Sent in by: Brenna) Ya, TO BE NICE..

hajra "God, Edward, get over yourself already!" Haha I LOVE Edward...<3

Jakesgirl94 this is something bella would never say "A baby ,with Edward? I'd rather have puppies!"

IcelandGirl812 These are funny, but on page 431 of Breaking Dawn she says "I'll race you" so #22 doesn't really apply anymore....

hello93 number 44 and 49 are my favorites !! XD

dogluverof2 this is so funny, i love all of it

hellgirl223 lol @ 18!

twilighter-duh i love # 47 its hilirous

jem_ This doesn't have a number --->"I'm sorry Edward, but I'm seriously considering going and marrying Jacob tommorow. Hope you don't mind. (Sent in by: Morgan)"..It's right above number 36. Btw, I love the list it's so funny xP.

taelor4twilight LMAO here's one: "*sigh* Well... Edward see, when you were gone i sort of had a little fun with Jessica, Mike, Tyler, Jacob, Seth, Angela, Leah, Emily, Quil, Billy, Embry and Eric... if u kno what i mean." "Edward, Jacob told me he's madly in love in with you. But i think we can work sumthing out here. I'll take you on weekends!"

sampot haha... heres 1: "Jake could we get married???"

7_steph_7 heres one, renesmee, i hate you, im leaving you and your dad adn marrying paul. XD

7_steph_7 i like numbers 8, 13, 17, 19, 21, 23, 30, 37, 38, 39, 41, and 50! theyre awesome! lol

babina lol! that was hilarious my fave: 12,10,44,49 and many others here is another 1: damn it Edward won't you stop kissing me!

werewolflover 21 is FUNNY.i like things that involve screamin.

Inmagic_x3 38 LMAO XD

percyandpotter Edward: *leaning in to make Bella a vampire* Bella: Oh, wait, I changed my mind.

lysolwipe Oh my gosh these where so funny! I really liked 41. 41) Edward, you are the cheese in my macaroni!

twilight_james i liked 1-50!! they are ALL awesome!

XD3 #13 was just someone over thinking cuz it was gay

4

Lizzie's Story, Chapter Three

posted by foreveryours

Chapter 3:

I paused in a small bakery and stomped my feet in an attempt to stimulate the circulation of blood through to my Frozen toes. I headed toward the counter and ordered a French baguette, which I always did before going over to Martin’s for cena because his mother loved them so much. As I waited for the overly tanned baker to finish wrapping up my baguette, I stared out of the window. February in Seattle was one of the dreariest months of the year, especially when it was raining. As if the heavens were listening to my thoughts, a few drops clattered onto the sidewalk. Wonderful....

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Kidnapped-Chapter 10

posted by ktbminnie12

Bella’s POV

Was I seeing this right? I wiped my eyes to see if I was seeing things correctly. Yep. Sure was. This was the last person I would expect to come save me.
    “Bella. Bella Swan?” he asked in the voice I remembered from the lat time I saw him.
    “Aro? What are te doing here?” I asked.
    Aro shot down the stairs in a second. He crouched in front of me.
    “I came here because our dear friend Lorenzo has broken the rules,” he said.
    “What did he do?” I asked.
    “He...

5

Lust CHAPTER EIGHT

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

BLOOD LUST. . . . . .By: BuffyFaithfan1
"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""Chapter Eight: When The Stars Go Blue...""""

There is this lyric from a song da Haley James Scott called DANCING WHEN THE STARS GO BLUE. Its a cover for the song da Tim McGraw WHEN THE STARS GO BLUE. The lyric is: "...Where do te go when youre lonely?..." And it got me thinking. . . .Where DO te go when your lonely? Like where does the lonelyness go? Does it just vanish into thin air? Disappear into the darkness of the past? Fly off into its cave like hole, waiting to affet some body else? o does...

8

Cliff Diving

posted by Alice_President

Okay, I have never done anything like this before, so please do not laugh, but constructive criticism is welcome. Thanks <3

This is my version of Bella's cliff diving experience in New Moon:

Plummeting through the air at a million miles an hour. I was soaring, cutting my path through the low hanging clouds. I was on superiore, in alto of the world, I was queen. I could see nothing but blue. Suddenly, the air was gone. I was covered in liquid, submerged in a pool of terror. I would have swum to the surface, I could see it, but my legs were failing me. I was going to die if I just stayed here, frozen. I started...

13

Starlit - Awakened (Chaper 12)

posted by Yoss

Every shade of green – jade, olive, smeraldo – looked dull. The trees held no interest for me. I expected, as I let my vampire senses took over me, that everything around me would burst in color, would awe me as they once did. I could see every spectrum of light, every tiny grain of soil and sand under my feet, I could hear every sound –the frantic cuore beats of the small animali cowering in fear, the slithering of the insects beneath the ground, the muffled cries of the birds as they flew away, the gentle whoosh of the breeze – I once found beauty in all these. Today, I found none....

27

New Story - Chapter Ten

posted by dinosteph

ciao guys. I just wanted to let everyone know that I really enjoy that te guys enjoy the story this far. I'm also wondering if te think it's going a little slow. I tend to explain things a lot, when it comes to scenes and other characters. I'm trying to include everyone in the family, so you're not wondering where everyone is.

I watched him, laying beside me, not moving. It had been a little over an ora and I couldn't ignore the noises coming from my stomach anymore.

“Edward?” I whispered, tapping his arm lightly, unsure if I should bother him o not. I watched as he closed his eyes, lines...

meeting emmet(rose's story)

posted by twilight0girl

a hunt to remenber
today, the sun was shing bright,so today were staying home to hunt.it was just a normal day.at least thats what i thought.just as i was just about to pounce on a mountain lion,i heard a screech of pain and terror."edward!"i called."what!whats wrong!"he shouted"did te hear that,someone's screaming."his expresion changed from concern to concentration."edward,edward"i said"shhh,im concentrating."on what?"i hear it now,"he detto "im going to check it out."what!why does edward get to check every thing out?!"no!i'll do it."i blurted."o.k if te say so."i started running to the...

5

Unchained Melody: Chapter One

posted by SaraE

This is my first Twilight fan fiction. I started Scrivere it a bit after I read Eclipse. So it's set after that, and does not mesh with Breaking Dawn. Anyway, I got the idea while listening to the song Unchained Melody, hence the title, and started Scrivere it. I'm looking for a beta reader, btw! Feedback is much appreciated.

* * *

Unchained Melody

“Cold feet?” I heard his voice whisper into my ear. I would have jumped o screamed if it wasn’t for the fact I seem to be in a catatonic state. I knew it was Jacob’s voice, but I couldn’t see him. Even if he were to walk up in front of my wide...

10

Dreamnapped-Chapter Two The Party

posted by Twilight597

Chapter Two-The Party

    Charlie and I ate at the lodge than we left to Edward’s house. Edward was waiting on the porch. Charlie left and Edward and I went inside. The inside of the Cullen’s house looked like a dance club, but so much better. Alice must have gone way overboard again. It was almost eight o’clock, so guest should be joining us soon.
    Jess, Angela, Mike, Ben, Lauren, and Eric were the first to come. I found out I barely knew anybody here.
    “The mutt is still not here, but I cant see anything” Alice said...

18

Kayla, Chapter 13

posted by twilight-7

Chapter 13 Guys, I wrote as fast as I could.

Jacob’s eyes refused to open. My eyes filled with moisture and tears rolled down my cheeks. I had probably killed him. I had my mind focused on his so I would be able to hear even the faintest of his thoughts, so that I would know he was ok. I was going to call Charlie but I realised that Jacob didn’t need the police. He needed a doctor. And what doctor could get here in less than three minutes?
I patted myself down, searching for my cell phone. I knew I had it when I left the house today so I must have on me somewhere. I found it in my jean pocket....

15

Aura--Chapter 8--Return

posted by mikaela_isabela

ciao guys, this is a loooooooong chapter, i had a lot of inspiration...so enjoi!

As we pulled into out drive-way, I was pretty much on the edge of my seat.
We were finally home, and I needed to see Bella. Carlisle could feel my tension.
“Edward, there’s no point going to her now, she’ll be fast asleep. It’s almost 7 in the morning.”
You’ll need to give her sometime, Edward. Let her cool off. Esme, always the logical thinker. But she has had over three months to cool off, and if I don’t see her now, I might just explode.
As soon as the car pulled to a stop, Alice said, “Have fun…”...

21

Moonlight - Chapter Six

posted by Twilight_F

Here is the long awaited Chapter six....well not very long awaited...but here it is!!!! I got my ideas from the Twilight libri so there are connections. Please READ, RATE AND COMMENT!!!! ENJOY!!!!!

CHAPTER 6

This chapter is a flashback from the time when Bella’s parents died. Bella’s mum’s POV. (Renée’s POV)

It was raining heavily as Charlie, Bella and I were coming back from a supper. Bella was sleeping deeply in the back seat. When suddenly a flash of lightening came down from the sky. I heard a CRACK and in front of us fell a huge tree. Charlie braked vigorously. But it wasn’t enough....

26

Moonlight - Chapter One

posted by Twilight_F

This is my first one so please read and comment. I got my ideas from the Twilight Saga. Hope te like it and if te do I will do more!! Sorry it's quiet short but I want to make puntellare, riva people like it first.

I was cold and wet as I scurried away from the orso that was meters from me. But this orso was oblivious to the fact that I might be his supper. I was crawling on my hands and knees, trying to get away from this creature. But in my blind panic, I slipped and snapped a branch that I was leaning on for support.
A sudden wave of reality hit me. I was going to die. This...

4

Forks, Chapter 2, New Kids

posted by doyouknow

Never in a million years would I have thought I would warm to Forks. The rain and the cold didn’t bother me anymore, but maybe that was because Jacob was always unseasonably warm.
It’s been two months since I first arrived here, and I was settling down quite well. I had made a couple of new Friends in school; Jessica, Mike, Eric, Tyler and Angela were becoming quite good Friends at this point. Although I got the impression that Mike and Eric wanted a little bit more. That didn’t bother me though, I already had a boyfriend. Ever since that first giorno Jacob and I had been inseparable. Charlie...

31

Sunbreak 3. There Are 4565 Cracks In My Ceiling. Jacob.

posted by mrsblack_1089

ATTENTION TEAM EDWARDS Leggere THIS: Do NOT let the chapter heading affect your descision to read this. I know how some of te felt about the POV of Jacob in BD, but just read this like te would if it was Edward's POV. Thanks! Enjoy!

I tried again to picture what my life had been like without Renesmee, and came up mostly blank. All I could remember was that I had spent it mostly with Bella. Before Bella, I couldn't remember at all. Then every detail with Nessie was crystal clear. I could remember every expression on her face since she had been born.
It wasn't natural to be away from our imprinted...

9

Vampire Confusion

posted by vampiress015

I was just thinking about Twilight-as always, and well I'm a little stuck, and I need your help.

So Vampires, Blood-Suckers, Leeches, whatever te wanna call 'em, they're amazing, right? But then again they have their faults: they have a thirst that water won't solve, they have to keep moving around so they don't attract attention etc etc.
But then I thought about this one, I was answering a pick about Rosalie (good pick btw teNaxx, there's a omaggio coming your way) and I kinda voiced my opinion about her mostrare everyone that being a vampire isn't that great. At the time I was thinking about her...

20

my twilight fantasy

posted by luvrofedward

Image Credit: -vintage-aerith @ deviantart.com

here is my twilight fantasy life......
it is SERIOUS fantasy, its also SUPER long(I am NOT exaggerating so if te are doing something important, te should wait to read this some other time), some of the parts of the story are not in relation to twilight at all, while others are, so if i get something different than the book, its probably on purpose, and I’m not wrong, I’m just making stuff up!
also it is in a first-person story-thingy so if te get lost, sorry! AND it is my first story-thingy(haha) so dont sue me if its THAT bad. just tell me where i can improve! commento PLEAZ!

My name is...