te died…. What else do te want. te just died… Okay, fine. te then met me, God, of course. Who else is going to narrate this story? Anyway, te came to me and said, “Who are you”?
I said, “I am God”?
And te said, “So… you’re Sonic.EXE”.
And I said, “... You’re a special kind of stupid”.
And te just sat there like a moron. Anyway, I then said, “Well, anyway, I am the actual God, the creator of the world, and so on and so forth. And you’re dead. te got in a bad car accident. Smashed your ribs, which mutilated te from the inside. Real gross. Blood everywhere. The usual ways te die in these stories”.
And te said, “So, do I go to Heaven”?
And I said, “No, te are going to be reborn. And, I believe te will be reborn as… A… criceto with a birth defect”.
te said, “So, what about everyone else”?
And I said, “What about them”?
And te said, “Well, won’t they remember me”?
And I said, “Of course not. You’re Them. This whole world is made for you. te are everyone”?
Confused, te said, “Wait, I’m everyone”?
And I said, “Yep”.
te said, “So, I was Abraham Lincoln”?
And I said, “And te were John Wilkes Booth”.
te said, “I was Hitler”?
And I said, “And you’re the millions he killed”.
te said, “I’m the guy who slept with every girl”.
And I said, “And, in the end, te were only sleeping with yourself”.
te stood there, shocked, “So, you’re saying that the world is…”.
I interrupted, saying, “An egg? Yes”.
Then te said, “Mmm, eggs”.
I just stood there, annoyed, then finally said, “Just get out of here” and I sent te on your way

End of Part 2