2. We like to be called pretty often. Tell it to us o someone else will.
3. We cagna about EVERYTHING. Let us rant for a little while.
4. If te won't hold our hands in public, forget us blowing te in private.
5. There can never be too much spooning. Bitches Amore Cuddling.
6. There's nothing we like più than te hugging us from behind and whispering something in our ear.
7. Foreplay is not an option….. it's a prerequisite.
8. OPEN THE DOOR FOR US.
9. Make us feel like the only girl in the room, no matter where we are.
10. Please us in bed, o your friend will.
11. We fake orgasms.
12. The concept of premenstrual syndrome was invented da a woman in Iowa who was trying to come up with a way to call her husband shit-for-brains without repercussions. MEANING we have an excuse once a mese for being a complete asshole, te don't.
13. Send us fiori for no apparent reason.
14. If te cry più than we do thats a major no no.
15. te can think girls are hot but don't let us know.
16. We most likely have snooped through your phone at least once… o twice.
17. Talk dirty to us in bed.
18. Girls are much better liars than boys so when your lying we can probably tell.
19. Manicures, our hair and jewelry are a few of our preferito things.
20. If te don't act like soap-opera guys, don't expect us to dress like Victoria's Secret models.
21. Don't act differently towards us in front of your friends. Treat us better than te usually do.
22. Make out with us in front of people te know. It makes us feel special and wanted.
23. te are most likely never going to have a threesome with us so te might as well give up.
24. We go to the bathroom in groups to talk about you…. o to do coke.
25. We talk about sex way più than te do.
26. Shaving is a major bitch. But if we do it, te better do the same.
27. Don't flirt with our friends.
28. Rest assured, we may not have “liked” your picture, but we definitely saw it.
29. We can be dirt poor but still find the money for new shoes.
30. We understand te don't care what we're wearing but complaint it anyway WE CARE WHAT WE'RE WEARING.
31. Being pale to us is social suicide.
32. When te break up with us, that means it's over, and we will only sleep with te two o three più times.
33. No matter who te are o what te look like, it's always flattering when te hit on us.
34. It's a proven fact that girls get colder than guys hence why we want to cuddle after sex.
35. te look sexiest in a tux.
36. Girls can take selfies, men most certainly can not.
37. If we Amore you, there is nothing so filthy that te can't say it in bed.
38. When we say, 'I don't like to play games,' it's because we are very experienced at playing games.
39. "You aren't the only one who thinks that two women having sex is hot. If we haven't tried it, most of us have at least imagined what it would be like to baciare a pair of shiny red lips." - Maria Bello.
40. te ALWAYS have to side with us.
41. We like when te feel comfortable telling us little things about you.
42. We Amore good morning texts from you.
43. We need te to be reachable at all times, but we don't always pick up our phones when te call. We realize this seems like a double standard.
44. Bad breathe is the biggest turn off.
45. Our enemies better not be your friends.
46. When we ask te how your giorno was we expect an answer a little longer than just "fine."
47. We understand if we ask te whats wrong and te say nothing but we will keep trying to get something out of you.
48. "Women are interested in A-list things: A designers, A vacations, A orgasms." -Kim Cattrall
49. Comfort us and try to make us feel better when we're upset.
50. We always want half of your dessert… but will never order it. So men, ORDER IT.
51. We have stalked your exs on Facebook and Instagram.
52. We want te to make the first move.
53. We Amore cheesy romantic comedies.
54. te want us skinny, we want to see a six pack.
55. Do not try too hard to make sense of the strange dynamics of female friendships. We can hate our Friends one giorno and Amore them the next.
56. If we go down on te we expect te to return the favor…. and please guys don't use your teeth while you're down there.
57. The trashier the reality TV mostra the better.
58. We know te watch porn.. And that's fine, watch all the porn te want as long as you're not physically having sex with anyone then we are fine.
59. Our beauty routine takes time. Be patient.
60. We only go down if te keep your erba cut.
61. We want to take cheesy couple pics so we can mostra the world how cute we look.
62. No part of us wants to know how much your mom loved your ex.
63. Us watching te play video games does not count as spending quality time together. In fact, we hate watching te play video games ever.
64. te are required to like our best friend and if te don't, fake it.
65. We want to meet your family and for them to like us.
66. Wine is the quickest way to get a girl talking.
67. Women always win in arguments. Give up.
68. We hate your taste. We will never agree who te drool over, unless it's Megan Fox.
69. We like te to be jealous.
70. We are constantly on our iPhones. We're not bored it's just habit.
71. We can have guy friends, this does not mean we are having sex with them.
72. "I was drunk" is not an excuse for cheating, o being an asshole. Two can play that game.
73. Include us in things.
74. taco campana, bell o any fast Cibo restaurant is not an acceptable place to take us on a date… EVER.
75. 50 shades of Grey changed the sex world for us all. Tie us down and use props.
76. We don't want to hear about your ex girlfriend.
77. We most definitely do not want to watch the sports game.
78. We are emotional and cry a whole lot.
79. This is how we see it, don't call = don't care.
80. We expect te to remember our anniversary. Game over if te forget.
81. Don't take too long to reply to our texts, we aren't as patient as te men.
82. We can be late, te can't.
83. Way to tell if you're being an asshole… Would te like it if a guy treated your sister that way? Didn't think so.
84. We like PDA and don't care if te don't.
85. We still stalk our exes regularly… this doesn't mean we still have feelings for them but as long as social media exists we will continue keeping tabs on their lives.
86. How to satisfy a women is easy. Cuddle with her.
87. The silent treatment is indication that te did something wrong.
88. We Amore when te have a nickname for us that only te use.
89. Even if te think it is cool to burp, fart, o emit other strange gases from your body, it is not.
90. We Amore it when te ask for our advice.
91. At the end of the giorno we would pick a guy with a fantastic personality who can make us laugh over a guy with a hot body no matter how much we tell our Friends otherwise…
92. Never mostra up to a bar in athletic shoes/attire…. Speaking of appropriate attire "wife beaters" are not an adequate form of fashion.
93. Don't seem too needy but also don't seem to distant.
94. Thanks to DIsney, we all believe in fairy tale endings and expect te to provide us with one. Don't disappoint.
95. We may order salads in front of te but trust me our mouths are watering for that cheese burger te ordered.
96. Take us on the craziest data te can think of. We are bored of the traditional movie and cena dates.
97. Our future weddings already planned out in our heads. Don't think we're psychotic thats just what us girls do.
98. Play with our hair and massage us. We will Amore te for it.
99. If we really Amore you, we will do anything in our power not to let te go.
100.We couldn't Amore anything più than when te tell us "I Amore you."
from the internet :)
(1) Tell him that he looked better bald.
(2) Put purple dye in his shampoo.
(3) When he goes to get his hair trimed, tell the barber that he would get 100 dollars to cut all his hair off.
(4) Ask what it was like to have Ke$ha babysit him.
(5) Tell him he reminds te of the Ken doll.
(6) Ask if Selena is his Barbie girl.
(7) Change his ringtone to 'Whip my Hair'.
(8) Call him while he's doing a talk show.
(9) Ask why he keeps making songs about relationships.
(10) Ask if he wants to dump Selena because he keeps making those songs.
(11) Give his fangirls his home adress
(12) Finally, ask why he goes for older women instead of 16-year olds. When he risposte he thinks they're cute tell him that your telling Selena that she's too young for him
(1) Tell him that he looked better bald.
(2) Put purple dye in his shampoo.
(3) When he goes to get his hair trimed, tell the barber that he would get 100 dollars to cut all his hair off.
(4) Ask what it was like to have Ke$ha babysit him.
(5) Tell him he reminds te of the Ken doll.
(6) Ask if Selena is his Barbie girl.
(7) Change his ringtone to 'Whip my Hair'.
(8) Call him while he's doing a talk show.
(9) Ask why he keeps making songs about relationships.
(10) Ask if he wants to dump Selena because he keeps making those songs.
(11) Give his fangirls his home adress
(12) Finally, ask why he goes for older women instead of 16-year olds. When he risposte he thinks they're cute tell him that your telling Selena that she's too young for him
1. read
2. go outside
3. do ur homework
4. go around the house saying random things until u cry laughing
5. continue Leggere this
6. Walk up to siblings and say random things until they hit u and then say u r cracking them up
7. play cards
8. dance
9. play checkers
10.read about canadian dudes
11. hit ur siblings, run 2 mommy and say, They hit me!!!!!
12. go on utube
13.talk on phone 4 hrs.
14. go on another fanclub
15. try 2 find me on Facebook and figure out im not on, i dnt have an account
16. go on Google look up ghiandaia, jay leno, find 15 jokes and have a 13 round comedy c ontest with ur bff
17. write on ur wall
18. write on other peoples walls
19. add random people as ur fans
20. read another forum.
2. go outside
3. do ur homework
4. go around the house saying random things until u cry laughing
5. continue Leggere this
6. Walk up to siblings and say random things until they hit u and then say u r cracking them up
7. play cards
8. dance
9. play checkers
10.read about canadian dudes
11. hit ur siblings, run 2 mommy and say, They hit me!!!!!
12. go on utube
13.talk on phone 4 hrs.
14. go on another fanclub
15. try 2 find me on Facebook and figure out im not on, i dnt have an account
16. go on Google look up ghiandaia, jay leno, find 15 jokes and have a 13 round comedy c ontest with ur bff
17. write on ur wall
18. write on other peoples walls
19. add random people as ur fans
20. read another forum.
okay, on my 5 completely random things to do...
5) sing the alphabet backwards in german while painting a picture of yourself riding a tandem bike
4) clip out something from the newspaper and tape it to your shirt
3) try to do the chicken dance as long as te can
2) walk into walmart and ask where the nearest walmart is and directions to it
1) scream "where did i put my flaming green octopus?" as loud as te can in a public place (ie. school, mall...bathroom)
i recommend te try these. 2 and 1 are my faves.
5) sing the alphabet backwards in german while painting a picture of yourself riding a tandem bike
4) clip out something from the newspaper and tape it to your shirt
3) try to do the chicken dance as long as te can
2) walk into walmart and ask where the nearest walmart is and directions to it
1) scream "where did i put my flaming green octopus?" as loud as te can in a public place (ie. school, mall...bathroom)
i recommend te try these. 2 and 1 are my faves.
The superiore, in alto six reasons computers must be female:
6. As soon as te have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
2. The message "Bad Command o File Name" is about as informative as
"If te don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
As soon as te make a commitment to one, te find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
6. As soon as te have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
2. The message "Bad Command o File Name" is about as informative as
"If te don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
As soon as te make a commitment to one, te find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
1.everyone around te has an attitude problem
2.your adding Cioccolato chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything te say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive te crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and te just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to punch, punzone someone without a reason
12.if te start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if te were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give te 10
a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so te know*
2.your adding Cioccolato chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything te say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive te crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and te just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to punch, punzone someone without a reason
12.if te start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if te were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give te 10
a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so te know*
